I do not believe it is right to go at a persons beliefs with the soul purpose of proving them wrong. Or of proving yourself smarter, better, or even right. I don't care what the belief is... if it's what they are standing on if it is all that is holding them up...why do people feel the need to destroy it? Why not help improve it change it, why not show love....
This I think is one of the major differences between a true follower of Christ and an unbeliever sharing their beliefs and opinions.
1. Someone with true faith and respect for fellow men will share what they believe and why without telling a person all they believe in is wrong, or a lie, or whatever to an extent. We can only share Christ word and love, then wait for the holy spirit to do it's work. We can not take credit for a changed heart or a saved soul...It's like the child asking for a reward for following directions. It's expected of us to spread the word.
2 Someone with true faith will in essence give a person something else to stand on, another hope then step back to let God strip away the rest...
3. There is no pride in showing and sharing your faith, it's not about you. At the end you should have NOTHING to brag about... It's about God's love it's about the grace, it's about how you are no better then any other person on the face of this earth. It's about the cross, it's about forgiveness, and if you share your opinions and beliefs with someone who believes differently...it's about respect NOT tolerance. It's about telling not judging even if what you have to say is hard for them to hear.
Maybe it's a difference in confidence. In another blog I read by Kevin A. Thompson he wrote about why that jerk at your office, that arrogant and rude status poster on facebook might really be lacking true confidence. They might doubt themselves and not even know it, they might be trying to convince themselves...They maybe be hurting. Kinda helps you get a new perspective.
It takes a lot more confidence to NOT believe in the grace of God then it does to actually except God's grace.
To not believe, you have to have confidence that you are right , you afterlife will be fine. You can earn heaven or paradise or a good second life. Or you have to be confidant that there is not heaven hell or even any God at all YOU have to do it all.
All while being so very broken....so very human. No pressure.
Ah, but to be on the other side, to believe in God and his promises to receive his grace and forgiveness. It's a confidence with contentment..confidence with peace. When your content AND confident you don't have to destroy others systems and beliefs because they don't line up with yours...you just want to share your contentment your hope your story...you are no better in anyway then any other...
It's this confidence with peace that builds up... it's why a Christian can walk away from a fight, Why we don't have to get angry when someone tries to destroy our faith. IT's why at the end of it all we can be told we are wrong and they can fight us with perfectly good reason and logic and we can say okay...and walk away still confident and peaceful. Not because we are blind, or stupid, or weak minded...but because we have peace with who we are and what we believe... Faith goes beyond reason...
So the next time you face that obnoxious person in our office, the next time you read that status that just makes you go really? before you respond to the person think about why you are responding. Speak kindly, instruct, build up but don't be scared to share the truth even if it's not what they want to hear, even if it goes against all that society says is acceptable ...with your words hope can live or die. And be prepared for them to walk away thinking no different then they did before.
Speak Life.
Wednesday, February 26, 2014
Sunday, February 23, 2014
balancing acts.
Identity...
I don't have children, I know that if I had them I would be proud and love to share pictures of them. However, being on the other end of this still; surrounded by young parents (most all my friends have children) in this wonderful age and curse of social media. I know what it's like to sign into facebook and see post, after post, after post, of pictures, status, or comments about my friends children. I feel very little connection with some of my friends as individual adults... Like some people got married, had children and then had no life, no identity, outside of their children.
I'm not talking no life: like no time to talk on the phone, or stay out late, or drink or what not..but no life beyond their children even when they do get a night out... but maybe since I don't have children I'm missing something...
I'm not so naive to think that my friends are going to be able to do the things I can do with out kids. Nor do I think they should. You can go way to the other end of this and address those who never spend time with their children...
However, I know enough of my friends who have found a balance between having their children and still having some sort of social life, hobbies, interest beyond their children. It might only be a night out with the girls once a month, or some who refuse to really put anything much about their children on social media. My one friend told me once that she makes sure she has time each morning to spend time alone with God FIRST then with her son. I had another mom tell me she doesn't mind not being able to get on facebook anymore because all she ever sees is others peoples children.. It's not that they love their children less then those who can't seem to go 5 minutes without speaking of them.. they just have a balance I hope I will be able to have if I ever have children.
It's not necessarily bad to share cute moments with your children on social media, nor do I mind it now and again..though I'm still not convinced it's always the safest thing to do.(that's a whole different topic) I do know that those out there who don't have children for one reason or another can find the endless parade of their friends children and even acquaintances children on their news feed slightly overwhelming...but really isn't that all social media and interactions these days...just to much...
(still not as annoying as all those stupid captioned pictures...or worse those stupid cartoons...of course that's just my opinion. share away lovely minions)
Again I don't know what it's like to have children I've never felt that all consuming love for a squirming baby... I got that... I love being able to see pictures of my friends kids, that I don't get to see often. I'm not saying don't do it at all...just like in all areas of life there needs to be a balance...
You are a mom yes...your children are not all their is to your life (I don't think) moms are often a wife, a daughter, a co-worker, a friend..Not first and foremost while your children are young but at some point....
Yes kids are great, yes I love them...yes they deserve your attention, love and a TON of your time... I understand you are proud to be parents...however to all parents out there at some point your kids will be grown and if you have spent the last 20 or more years without an sort of identity or interest outside of your children. If you have stopped trying to maintain even somewhat those other "rolls" God has given you here on earth, (maybe not all of them or even those I've listed)...what then is going to be left of who you are, who you were?
I don't have children, I know that if I had them I would be proud and love to share pictures of them. However, being on the other end of this still; surrounded by young parents (most all my friends have children) in this wonderful age and curse of social media. I know what it's like to sign into facebook and see post, after post, after post, of pictures, status, or comments about my friends children. I feel very little connection with some of my friends as individual adults... Like some people got married, had children and then had no life, no identity, outside of their children.
I'm not talking no life: like no time to talk on the phone, or stay out late, or drink or what not..but no life beyond their children even when they do get a night out... but maybe since I don't have children I'm missing something...
I'm not so naive to think that my friends are going to be able to do the things I can do with out kids. Nor do I think they should. You can go way to the other end of this and address those who never spend time with their children...
However, I know enough of my friends who have found a balance between having their children and still having some sort of social life, hobbies, interest beyond their children. It might only be a night out with the girls once a month, or some who refuse to really put anything much about their children on social media. My one friend told me once that she makes sure she has time each morning to spend time alone with God FIRST then with her son. I had another mom tell me she doesn't mind not being able to get on facebook anymore because all she ever sees is others peoples children.. It's not that they love their children less then those who can't seem to go 5 minutes without speaking of them.. they just have a balance I hope I will be able to have if I ever have children.
It's not necessarily bad to share cute moments with your children on social media, nor do I mind it now and again..though I'm still not convinced it's always the safest thing to do.(that's a whole different topic) I do know that those out there who don't have children for one reason or another can find the endless parade of their friends children and even acquaintances children on their news feed slightly overwhelming...but really isn't that all social media and interactions these days...just to much...
(still not as annoying as all those stupid captioned pictures...or worse those stupid cartoons...of course that's just my opinion. share away lovely minions)
Again I don't know what it's like to have children I've never felt that all consuming love for a squirming baby... I got that... I love being able to see pictures of my friends kids, that I don't get to see often. I'm not saying don't do it at all...just like in all areas of life there needs to be a balance...
You are a mom yes...your children are not all their is to your life (I don't think) moms are often a wife, a daughter, a co-worker, a friend..Not first and foremost while your children are young but at some point....
Yes kids are great, yes I love them...yes they deserve your attention, love and a TON of your time... I understand you are proud to be parents...however to all parents out there at some point your kids will be grown and if you have spent the last 20 or more years without an sort of identity or interest outside of your children. If you have stopped trying to maintain even somewhat those other "rolls" God has given you here on earth, (maybe not all of them or even those I've listed)...what then is going to be left of who you are, who you were?
Saturday, February 22, 2014
Freedom and Dreams.
The joy of teaching, the wondering in watching the hardships and trials in life turn into a huge huge blessing. Remembering it's not me...it's YOU.
Teaching..
I remember in college the decision to drop the education track, after spending my entire life wanting to be a teacher it was hard to understand how that desire could just shrivel up and die like it did. I remember the floundering around after to figure out what I should do instead and now almost 8 years later I'm no closer then I was then. I'm not a very driven person, in some ways the lack of a desire to have a career, make a mark on the world, a name for myself, or have a bunch of money is probably a good thing. I'm not lazy either. But now...now a couple years away from 30 shifting through memories and plans and dreams that evaporated, either by choice or by circumstance... it's like an empty journal you always meant to write in and didn't and not from lack of trying but a fear of messing up the page.
You are as free to the same extent you are fearless.
I almost told my boss "no" two years ago...when offered a lead teacher job in a 3 year old room. I almost gave into that fear in the back of my mind of you will fail, you can't do it, don't even try. Almost but I didn't.
Teaching; a dream I thought I had chosen to walk away from...one that I find I enjoy very much. Every time I have designed to go a different direction with my life I've always come back to children. I.love.children.
You are free to the same extent that you are fearless.
I once read that there are years that ask questions and years that answer. I think they left out the years of just waiting which I think equal far more then either of the others. Yet, in all my waiting I seem to dream the most. It's in these times where hope bubbles and swells inside and breeds a certain empty longing. In essence...
A.Dream.
In all our planning how often we forget to be content in our current circumstances whether those be waiting, asking, or answering. Dreams I thought gone have re-kindled and presently in life seem far realistic then I ever really wanted them to be.
I've been hunting down and regrouping old photos that are lost on a dead computer and collecting them from various other places. Now and then I run across a photo that I call a pivotal moment. Upon remembering the moment I remember the over- whelming feeling that everything is perfect. Yet knowing that when the next day comes it will never be this way again, You have reached the top and there is not where but down you have no idea how you know it, it's just a feeling in your heart....these people will never all be in one place at the same time again, This place can't stand forever...they.just.wont. Except for in that picture, that moment it's just that, a photo of a perfect moment in time when you wish life could go on forever just.like.that. Safe and familiar.
But that's not freedom, that's not fearless.
I treasure those moments, those feelings, that knowledge that at this moment you are fully enjoying life...if even just for that moment. Though I don't want it to end it's lovely to wonder what what the next one will be.
This is the day the Lord has made, I will rejoice and be glad in it.
Yet I have hope for a future..and in that hope, I find a joy in waiting for the time. Until then I'll teach and love other's children. God will bless me so that I can bless them and in an off hand way I can make a mark on this world...because the drive to love children is a joy and a blessing.
I am free to the same extent I'm fearless.... I am fearless to the same extent that I love.
I'm instructed to love as God loves....unconditionally...what kind of freedom is that?
Teaching..
I remember in college the decision to drop the education track, after spending my entire life wanting to be a teacher it was hard to understand how that desire could just shrivel up and die like it did. I remember the floundering around after to figure out what I should do instead and now almost 8 years later I'm no closer then I was then. I'm not a very driven person, in some ways the lack of a desire to have a career, make a mark on the world, a name for myself, or have a bunch of money is probably a good thing. I'm not lazy either. But now...now a couple years away from 30 shifting through memories and plans and dreams that evaporated, either by choice or by circumstance... it's like an empty journal you always meant to write in and didn't and not from lack of trying but a fear of messing up the page.
You are as free to the same extent you are fearless.
I almost told my boss "no" two years ago...when offered a lead teacher job in a 3 year old room. I almost gave into that fear in the back of my mind of you will fail, you can't do it, don't even try. Almost but I didn't.
Teaching; a dream I thought I had chosen to walk away from...one that I find I enjoy very much. Every time I have designed to go a different direction with my life I've always come back to children. I.love.children.
You are free to the same extent that you are fearless.
I once read that there are years that ask questions and years that answer. I think they left out the years of just waiting which I think equal far more then either of the others. Yet, in all my waiting I seem to dream the most. It's in these times where hope bubbles and swells inside and breeds a certain empty longing. In essence...
A.Dream.
In all our planning how often we forget to be content in our current circumstances whether those be waiting, asking, or answering. Dreams I thought gone have re-kindled and presently in life seem far realistic then I ever really wanted them to be.
I've been hunting down and regrouping old photos that are lost on a dead computer and collecting them from various other places. Now and then I run across a photo that I call a pivotal moment. Upon remembering the moment I remember the over- whelming feeling that everything is perfect. Yet knowing that when the next day comes it will never be this way again, You have reached the top and there is not where but down you have no idea how you know it, it's just a feeling in your heart....these people will never all be in one place at the same time again, This place can't stand forever...they.just.wont. Except for in that picture, that moment it's just that, a photo of a perfect moment in time when you wish life could go on forever just.like.that. Safe and familiar.
But that's not freedom, that's not fearless.
I treasure those moments, those feelings, that knowledge that at this moment you are fully enjoying life...if even just for that moment. Though I don't want it to end it's lovely to wonder what what the next one will be.
This is the day the Lord has made, I will rejoice and be glad in it.
Yet I have hope for a future..and in that hope, I find a joy in waiting for the time. Until then I'll teach and love other's children. God will bless me so that I can bless them and in an off hand way I can make a mark on this world...because the drive to love children is a joy and a blessing.
I am free to the same extent I'm fearless.... I am fearless to the same extent that I love.
I'm instructed to love as God loves....unconditionally...what kind of freedom is that?
Tuesday, February 4, 2014
Drama, confrontation, and observations.
Criticism...I've never been very good at taking it, I've always appreciated it for the most part when delivered tactfully and with the intent to help. Yet even then I'm not good at taking it. I take things so personally all the time, things that are in no way my fault. I know I've come a long long way since high school and even early college..actually even since marriage. But yet I've cried a couple times now when a parent has come to me..and I feel terrible each time I do it because it makes that person feel bad..and it's not their fault. Then I get frustrated because they don't come to me again after that..Oh I could just shot myself (hows that for dramatic...)
I still and always will hate confrontation... though now I do confront despite that hate. It's way better then the worry, and the "drama" in not knowing.
It never stops amazing me; people can be so blind to their own faults. All people myself included.
“Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? 4 How can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? 5 You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye. ~Matthew 7:3-5~
It was brought to my attention rather bluntly that "I like drama" while I see where it's coming from because I am dramatic...I was a terribly dramatic child..just thinking about my childhood even through 8th grade I cringe...So yes I'm the first to admit I'm dramatic (just ask my older brothers)...but I've also been working on it and it's amazing how God can calm me and how far far FAR I have come since then (writing helps but God has helped more) However, I would not go so far to say that I "like" drama...
After this was said to me I was at first angry, yet I could not understand why I was angry about that? Maybe it was the way it was delivered. Like I was a child being put up with, as I do with my nieces dramatics, and not a friend or adult 27 years of age.. an annoyance...not an equal.
Maybe that's part of it... but I've been thinking about it for a while now, and I think it's always hard to have pointed out something you have been working hard on for so long a time. To feel like maybe I'm just fooling myself and I haven't improved. When in actuality I have but it's not 100%. Then to think farther on the subject and realize that some people last remember a younger and in my case a less calm individual, they have not been around for one reason or another as life happens...to see the growth and change.
I wonder how many times I have done this to people... held against them their past actions forgetting that in some matters people do indeed change...
"Brothers, I do not consider myself yet to have taken a hold of it. But on thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead." ~Philippians 3:13~
We.grow.up.
This is not a justification of my actions or rather my (writings). It's an observation. I'm not good at being blunt in an awkward situation...so I hint, and self ridicule instead of simply asking straight out what or if someone has a problem with me...or if it's all good. I know I don't take confrontation well and I assume wrongly that others are the same way. Actions I didn't even realize I did until this conversation giving off the appearance of drama, then it was like glass shattering and it all made sense. I use to just let things go and it would build and build and build...
So yeah, I'm not who I was 10 years ago, I'm not who I was 5 years ago, I'm nothing like I was 3 years ago. Thank. God.
You don't know who a person is by a couple of talks over a period of years...That's the joy of human interaction; you never know who your're going to meet, who will stick in your life and who will drift off... I thank God everyday for who he has made me to be..and I thank God for the people that have been through this whole journey with me, as well for the people who have fallen out, or who were only in it for a short time. Also for the few that have drifted in and out a number of times over the years.
Life is all your moments in a row..blink and watch them go. Tread softly tomorrow will pass in the twinkle of an eye.
I'll always be a writer, a poet, and therefor I will always play around with dramatics. I will always feel words, and thoughts...It's a way of life for me. Sometimes it's the only way I can keep breathing...Yet I know the need for balance.
"He has made everything beautiful in it's time, He has also set eternity in the hearts of men; yet they cannot fathom what God has done from begging to end." ~Ecclesiastes 3:11?~ (can't read my hand writing not near my bible it's 11 or 12.)
I have to stop tying myself wroth to the approval of others and my success in this world.
It's.not.about.me.
It's.about.
HIM
Amen.
I still and always will hate confrontation... though now I do confront despite that hate. It's way better then the worry, and the "drama" in not knowing.
It never stops amazing me; people can be so blind to their own faults. All people myself included.
“Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? 4 How can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? 5 You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye. ~Matthew 7:3-5~
It was brought to my attention rather bluntly that "I like drama" while I see where it's coming from because I am dramatic...I was a terribly dramatic child..just thinking about my childhood even through 8th grade I cringe...So yes I'm the first to admit I'm dramatic (just ask my older brothers)...but I've also been working on it and it's amazing how God can calm me and how far far FAR I have come since then (writing helps but God has helped more) However, I would not go so far to say that I "like" drama...
After this was said to me I was at first angry, yet I could not understand why I was angry about that? Maybe it was the way it was delivered. Like I was a child being put up with, as I do with my nieces dramatics, and not a friend or adult 27 years of age.. an annoyance...not an equal.
Maybe that's part of it... but I've been thinking about it for a while now, and I think it's always hard to have pointed out something you have been working hard on for so long a time. To feel like maybe I'm just fooling myself and I haven't improved. When in actuality I have but it's not 100%. Then to think farther on the subject and realize that some people last remember a younger and in my case a less calm individual, they have not been around for one reason or another as life happens...to see the growth and change.
I wonder how many times I have done this to people... held against them their past actions forgetting that in some matters people do indeed change...
"Brothers, I do not consider myself yet to have taken a hold of it. But on thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead." ~Philippians 3:13~
We.grow.up.
This is not a justification of my actions or rather my (writings). It's an observation. I'm not good at being blunt in an awkward situation...so I hint, and self ridicule instead of simply asking straight out what or if someone has a problem with me...or if it's all good. I know I don't take confrontation well and I assume wrongly that others are the same way. Actions I didn't even realize I did until this conversation giving off the appearance of drama, then it was like glass shattering and it all made sense. I use to just let things go and it would build and build and build...
So yeah, I'm not who I was 10 years ago, I'm not who I was 5 years ago, I'm nothing like I was 3 years ago. Thank. God.
You don't know who a person is by a couple of talks over a period of years...That's the joy of human interaction; you never know who your're going to meet, who will stick in your life and who will drift off... I thank God everyday for who he has made me to be..and I thank God for the people that have been through this whole journey with me, as well for the people who have fallen out, or who were only in it for a short time. Also for the few that have drifted in and out a number of times over the years.
Life is all your moments in a row..blink and watch them go. Tread softly tomorrow will pass in the twinkle of an eye.
I'll always be a writer, a poet, and therefor I will always play around with dramatics. I will always feel words, and thoughts...It's a way of life for me. Sometimes it's the only way I can keep breathing...Yet I know the need for balance.
"He has made everything beautiful in it's time, He has also set eternity in the hearts of men; yet they cannot fathom what God has done from begging to end." ~Ecclesiastes 3:11?~ (can't read my hand writing not near my bible it's 11 or 12.)
I have to stop tying myself wroth to the approval of others and my success in this world.
It's.not.about.me.
It's.about.
HIM
Amen.
Monday, January 6, 2014
Most political post.
Anyone that knows me knows I have no political opinions...honestly I don't care I have my beliefs and ideas of wrong and right from the Bible and I understand that politics and government dose not care what the Bible says.
The Bible tells me there will be wars or rumors of war. We will be prosecuted or look down on for our faith. As I sit back and watch state after state give the okay to gay marriage I don't find myself getting angry at Obama or the government or even the people passing the laws.
No I don't agree with it, and I believe it's a sin because I believe that Bible to be 100% God's word. I'm not so naive to think everyone will agree with me or even partly agree with me, thats not going to happen EVER.
I don't how however, agree with some of the way's people deal with their differences in beliefs from the judgments and the condemning and the pointing figures on EITHER side because believe me the intolerance goes both ways.
I don't normally write anything political on here, it's to much of a hot topic I have my opinions based in MY beliefs and it's not going to matter what I think until the end when we stand before God and until then I'll let him judge.
Until then the way the world is turning makes me sad, Sometimes as homosexuality is paraded (literally) in front of me, as hate crimes and war are on the rise, as the rich get more and the poor get less a small part of me is thankful I have yet and might never bring a child into this broken world. Even though I'm told not to fear for God has overcome the world it's a bit scary. However, it does not surprise me nor do I think it will get any better ever.
However, I say all that to say this.
I can't WAIT to have health coverage. I know people don't like the healthcare reform, and I've seen how it has screwed some people over, but thats not the law's fault thats the heath insurance fault.
I also hear of how big of a pain it is to sign up for it...but in the end if I can go to the doctor I'll take it. I think sometimes the world forgets the comfortable and the people passing laws forgets that there are MILLIONS of people who don't have insurance at all and don't qualify for state aid and can not even dream of having the money to go to the doctor without it. Some like my mom who hasn't had any sort of screening in 20 years. That scares me. Until now there wasn't even hope of her EVER getting it.
So yes like all things in this world, there is good and bad to everything, it is human made...and humans are not perfect and people that are all up in arms because it didn't roll out perfect right away and then turn to blame it all on a president or a party is a little extreme. Sometime in history in an history book this rough start to healthcare reform is going to be a little footnote.
The Media these days has this way of getting out of hand and that is the only difference between years ago and now...it's in your face sexuality, mistakes, war, crime,...you see it all which has always been going on. It's a blessing and a curse to be informed and more often then not lately I've preferred not to be.
because I hate politics.
Sorry and the terms tolerance, and politically correct piss me off.
Take heart...I have overcome the world...what a great bible verse.
Saturday, January 4, 2014
Praying for your husband or significant other.
I love how sometimes God moves me to write something and I chicken out...here I go
More then one couple I know are dealing with some marital issues right now..and my heart hurts for them. I am reminded how thankful I am for my husband..and how my prayers, my actions, and my words can help him each and every day. I'm real good at praying for others going through hardships. I'm real good at praying for myself...but sometimes I'm not so good at praying for my husband. He never tells me anything is wrong so what do I pray for?
My marriage is not perfect nor do I want it to be..it's work each day and a choice..and though I'm a firm believer in praying..I don't always do it until something goes wrong.
I think that is where we mess up as humans, as children of God. We have this nasty habit of praying AFtER something terrible happens. While we should pray for protection from bad things. Though it won't protect you from all things..we live in a broken and sin filled world...it can help..and it can strengthen you..
When I do remember to pray for my husband I have a routine..
1 I pray for his spiritual walk..his personal relationship with God. If he's strong in the word he can lead me, and he can better fight of sin and temptation...
2 I pray for his self esteem, confidence, health, and motivation (either in work, school and marriage).
3. I pray for protection of his heart from sin and temptation...and if faced with them the strength and honor to walk away.
4 I pray that I as his wife can help encourage him in all of these areas. That I can build him up and fulfill his needs physically, and mentally, so he does not have to look elsewhere for fulfillment.
I also pray when I'm angry...when I'm hurt so bad I cry I pray for my husband...prayer is love and honestly even when you don't think or feel like they deserve it prayer is going to help.
Men don't like to talk about "feelings" let's face it they are wired different then woman.. We had a lot of change and a lot of hard news in 2013 and my husband has hardly spoken of it to me. It use to bother me that he wouldn't talk about any thing....because I have to talk about everything..he deals differently. Sometimes all you can do for your spouse or your friends or even your family is pray....
Marriage I have found is an constant balance of understanding another person..and it's a constant sacrifice on both sides. It's a choice to love and feel for only one person for the rest of your life. Why not help your spouse enjoy that choice? It's so easy to get too busy to make time for each other, to stop dressing to impress each other, to stop trying to anticipate the others needs and get caught up in your own. It's so easy to focus on the negative all the things your spouse does wrong...to tally up scarf ices and mistakes and hold them against them...
Love keeps no record of wrong...
For some in this world..for a lot of people that line is understandably hard to acknowledge...
I'm not a marriage counselor, I'm no expert on what is exactly wrong with anyone's marriage..I'm not even able to handle some things in my marriage right...I'm not judging nor condemning anyone...
For I am the worst of sinners..
But I am so blessed in my marriage and I also know trust can be so easily broken...and so very hard to earn back..my heart hurts when I talk to people struggling in marriage..but I know we struggle to be made stronger...and it totally sucks.
It's a slow fade and it's never just one persons fault...
At some point in life you learn it's impossible to be just friends with a member of the opposite sex. Usually it's before you get married but after you have a very serious relationship..it just doesn't work Always on person or the other develops feelings for the other person. Though you would never act on the feelings putting yourself in temptation is not the way to deal with it.
If you don't learn this lesson before marriage then it's most likely learned the hard way after marriage. I'm not saying you can't maintain friendships with others from the opposite sex...I have many guys that are my friends but I refuse to hang out with them without my husband...at least in private...even if I have zero feelings for said guy. Out of respect for my husband and my marriage...it's not worth it.
The bible even says to flee from temptation to not place yourself in situations that could lead to temptation...
Prayer and God can help with a lot but if we don't take steps to safeguard our hearts and minds from temptation satan will jump on the chance to lead you astray and believe me he knows your weaknesses...he's a prowling lion looking for someone to devour,,
So, my New Years resolution every year is time with God every day...I'm adding praying for my husband and my marriage to that..every day. Amen
I challenge you even if your marriage is a mess right now to pray every day for 30 days for your spouse or significant other even if you haven't met him yet...
If you want to take that a step farther for 30 days do something to better yourself for your husband or significant other. Me I'm ganna start working out again to look good for him, make a fancy dinner, pack his lunch, wash his cloths, say something nice even if you want to hit him in the face...anything.. See if your marriage isn't stronger..or if you yourself are not a better person for it.
Amen!
Wednesday, January 1, 2014
My Trust Issues.
I said some things when last I wrote about some friends, though they were more observations and frustration then anything...I truly love them and always will. It has occurred to me though upon receiving an explanation as to the behavior how social media has destroyed a certain element of friendships that is needed. These days everyone just assumes that if they put something on facebook everyone will know or get the memo. The need to deliver a message personally has diminished greatly. I love having internet to stay in contact with friends far away...even countries away. But at what cost?
I've sorta backed off from facebook as of late...trying to find better ways to spend my time, trying to get back into the habit of praying and spending time in Gods word. So, I missed the memo and have now missed out on the chance to see a friend.
I just want to slow down, were all so busy all the time but when asked what we have been up to we get an "oh not much just been busy..no one can say exactly what they have been busy with...maybe it's face book or any other social media. Maybe they are busy with work and cramming every spare minute full of entertainment and people and more often then not alcohol...
It's been nice to slow down...unplug and granted the migraines and sleepless nights and sickness has
helped me slow down (great way to spend the new year...asleep before 9) . It's funny how sometimes God has to allow sickness or hardship to get you to slow down and spend some time with him. Even when you are doing great things for him, busy in the church or in missions we forget to take a break in Gods grace some one on one time...to plug in.
I've been struggling with trust issues as of late, trust in my friends, my ability to do my job, my church...it's amazing how fast trust can be broken. Or old wounds can be opened I.am.sorry.
In all this...it's nice to know that my trust in God is not misplaced, nor taken for granted. He will never let me down. People will fail you...God never will...
Sometimes I am amazed at folks in this world that don't have faith in God..that the story of Gods grace doesn't touch, how hard it would be to get up every day and face the brokenness of this world with no hope..or with nothing more than hope in men... Or hope in yourself...
So yes my last blog said some things...
As I'm sure others will as well.
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