Saturday, June 21, 2014




  [en-tahy-tl-muhnt]  Show IPA
the act of entitling.
the state of being entitled.
the right to guaranteed benefits under a government program, as Social Security or unemploymentcompensation.

Main Entry:   Entitlement Generation
Part of Speech:   n
Definition:   the group born between 1979 and 1994 who believe they are owed certain rights andbenefits without further justification
Example:   The entitlement generation expects higher salaries, flexible work hours, and ample timeoff.
Usage:   slang

“Man is not, by nature, deserving of all that he wants. When we think that we are automatically entitled to something, that is when we start walking all over others to get it.” 
― Criss JamiDiotima, Battery, Electric Personality

“Beware: It is a quick transition from a nourishing sense of gratitude to a poisonous sense of entitlement.” 
― Steve MaraboliUnapologetically You: Reflections on Life and the Human Experience

God's grace is the undoing of entitlement. Really we all have sinned and we all are saved and no one deserves anything good but for the Grace of God.

  Working with children, it never stops amazing me how a child can demand something NOW and if they don't get how they can just shut down. They don't care if they don't participate their minds can not move beyond the fact that they didn't get what they want the way they want it. Most when allowed to sulk for a bit give in and join but more and more now I have kids that are just done for the rest of the day. THAT is a normal child development thing.

   If a child never learns to deal with the fact that it's not going to always be their way they will be less apt to deal with life in general. When we are old and need taking care of ourselves the younger generation will be so involved with entitling themselves to be happy and feel good they won't care. If they don't sacrifice some happiness as children they will not sacrifice it for others later on. We will see a world so entitled that the greater good and even the common good will be the individual good, that caring for others will be the stupidest most inconvenient thing ever thought off.

  As a child in my class sits under the table and sulks or sits on bench and screams I can't stop from thinking that this is a learned and more often then not groomed behavior by well meaning and loving parents who honestly don't know or realize what they are doing to their child. If you raise your child as the center of your world they are going to expect you to entertain them every second. They are going to expect you to drop EVERYTHING and pay attention to THEM. They are going to be little kids who through tantrums beyond the normal, they are going to be little kids who can't self entertain, problem solve, or self sooth. They are going to be teenagers that insult someone who doesn't get something fast (Iv'e seen it even in my 4 year olds) You are going to have teens, who break a rule and expect you to make it all better. You are going to have a young adult who has never experienced a let down, a failure (some of my let downs and failures were the greatest turning points in my life). You are going to have an adult who thinks they are entitle to have opinions and voice them regardless of how crass or rude or hurtful they are. Who think they are atomatically deserving of the highest pay and the best hours their first day... and you dear parent.... You are going to be a parent who complains, is always tired, and can't seem to get anything done EVER.

  I'm in the lump of  the entitlement generation 1986...I'm at the begging but I can look back and think where I have had thoughts reflecting entitlement. Starting out at a new job and having to work at year before any time off how outrageous that was to me.  How upset I can get when I lock my keys in a car and get mad because all my carefully laid plans are ruined and it's not fair but never then was it my fault.

 My husband and I waited for marriage and are there for entitled to a baby... it's not fair, but's life and I thank God I grew up dealing with life. My parents couldn't hand me everything I wanted, my parents could not focus all their attention on me. This does not mean they didn't love me and want the best for me..never once have i doubted the love of my family and I don't need "things" to know it.  My dad had a farm to run my mom and the neighbor hood to watch and a job. I know the world was different and it was safer for a child to play out of their parents sight.  The fact is that I could self-entertain with out internet, T.V.  or even friends close by. Sometimes I look at myself now, always on line or playing a game on my ipad, with the T.V. on and I think...there is no way I could do it anymore and sometimes I hate myself for that fact. No way I could be a teenager again with dial up internet...on a farm...without a car. I'm entitled to be entertained every moment of everyday.

I am so thankful for my parents and my childhood as hard as it sometimes was.

  My heart is sad. Sad for kids who will never experience such bitter disappointment that they get so angry they work harder before they give up. My heart is sad for me, my friends, and the people younger then me who will not be able to let their kids run all over the woods, and fields and neighbor hoods for hours. Because of a fear of someone who feels entitled to the right to be happy and take them or hurt them or even report you as being a neglectful parent. My heart is sad when I announce we are going outside and a 6 year old girl asks if she can bring her tablet outside and play with it. Sad for kids who won't ever go a day with out touching an electronic or watching less then 30 minutes of T.V. . For the kids and even some adults who think food comes from the store. Who doesn't know that carrots, and potatoes were covered with dirt.

  My heart breaks when a kid misses out on a great teaching moment because a parent can't bare to see them cry. My heart breaks for kids going to school at barely 3 years old and will be in school for the next 16 years not counting college. When parents can't see the need for a child to play ALL DAY if they want and learn the whole time, through trail and error, observation, and exploration. In a classroom setting.

“Instead of communicating "I love you, so let me make life easy for you," I decided that my message needed to be something more along these lines: "I love you. I believe in you. I know what you're capable of. So I'm going to make you work.” 
― Kay Wills WymaCleaning House: A Mom's Twelve-Month Experiment to Rid Her Home of Youth Entitlement

  No one is entitled to anything, especially if you hurt others to get it, or hurt others by saying it. We are blessed to have what we have,  and to be able to do what we can do. Never do you feel better then after working so hard, pouring your heart and soul into a project or activity and coming to the end of it successful. When you rob your child, or teen of that experience by giving everyone a ribbon or a spot on a team...or not letting them try something because you don't want to see them hurt. They will never know what working for something feels like. They will think they are entitled to it without blood sweat or tears.

  Entitlement like Tolerance is a learned behavior. Yes early childhood teachers are part of training a child in the way he should go. But if it's not reinforced at home, our work does little but teach a child the way we act in the classroom is not required for the rest of the world.

  There are so many things entitlement touches that I would love to get into. I know I pick on parents a lot, I know I don't have kids, I think as a parent I would struggle with watching my child experience a let down, a heart ache. I imagen parenting to be one of the hardest things to do these days. So many people are such amazing parents and if God ever blesses me with a child I hope to be half the parent they are... This has been a very heavy pregnant belly, birth announcement, face book month...and honestly it's been rough. Because of the entitlement in me it's not always easy to be happy for my friends. Yet its not about me..I might not be a parent but I work with your kids...and my heart breaks.

   Life isn't all love and sunshine, it's full of sinners, and storms. Don't lie to your them learn the skills to cope, give them the tools to deal, and show compassion. Give them a faith to praise God in the valleys as well as the on the mountains. Because if we can teach our children compassion and humility...we could change the world.

But for the Grace of God.

“When we replace a sense of service and gratitude with a sense of entitlement and expectation, we quickly see the demise of our relationships, society, and economy.” 
― Steve MaraboliUnapologetically You: Reflections on Life and the Human Experience

Therefore if you have any encouragement from being united with Christ, if any comfort from his love, if any common sharing in the Spirit, if any tenderness and compassion, then make my joy complete by being like-minded, having the same love, being one in spirit and of one mind. Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves,not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others. ~Philippians 2-4~

an read on the entitlement generation.

Friday, June 13, 2014

To the 20 somethings almost or just barely 30 somethings...

To the 20 somethings, almost to be 30 something's or even you almost 40 something' know who you are...

We are the group of people that should be well on their way down a career path or at least have an idea of a career path, home owners, family growing, life somewhat figured out people. No longer fresh out of college world at your feet pie in the sky kids. To what appears to be the majority of my friends... I'm so very happy for you, truly I am.

 To the people who look at a 27 almost 28 year old person or couple that isn't at that point yet, and asks the seemingly innocent questions: so when are you going to have kids?, the biological clock is ticking, think you are going to ever buy a house? when are you going to pick a career? To those people who look at all my friends and think, they obviously are doing what they should be doing what is socially considered normal at such an age... why aren't you.

I know you might just want to make conversation, I know you might generally be concerned and care. But please stop.

  I'm 27 years old, still working in the childcare setting as I have for the past decade, living with my husband in my parents basement. I have NO clue what I want to do with my life, I just know it's not what I'm doing currently. I have college debt, and credit card debt from said college life, car loan, and my husband is paying over 1000 dollars a class for a masters degree with more loans. All this on my daycare ran, private school, zero benefits teachers salary. I'm not complaining, we always have what we need when we need it. My husband is doing a great job and the fact that we can stay with my parents is a HUGE blessing.

I am well aware that I'm' the minority when it comes to children, and dogs, and fenced in yards you really don't have to remind me that a big scary clock is ticking I battle that old friend called envy and worry daily.

The thought of having the money to make a house payment or a down payment on a house isn't even fathomable to me. The thought of the loan that goes with such a endever makes my head spin.  So no I have no idea if we will ever buy a house, though I like to think so and I dream about it often.

You mean well, you care for me, but whats so wrong with what we are doing? The path God has lead us down? Who are you to compare my choices and situations and circumstances to anyone elses? Yes, my friends are all at different stations in life, and just because I don't appear to have what they appear to have doesn't mean I'm not right where I'm suppose to be right where God has placed us. It doesn't mean I'm not happy and complete. No, my life isn't perfect but I'm willing to bet you neither is anyone elses.

To the 20 somethings almost 30 somethings that are still in limbo, that have been for near a's OKAY you are not alone, and you're in the perfect position to go out and live LIFE. Take chances follow whims, be bold, have adventures, see the world and most importantly embrace what God has given you, and enjoy the freedom that comes with having no clue what you are going to do next. Because one day at a time, in HIS time God will get you to where you need to be.

So before you ask your single friend when they will get married or before you ask a young couple when they are going to have kids,  even if you are just curious stop long enough to think about the fact that maybe God hasn't gotten them to that point yet, maybe they are trying and can't and you could rip open a barely healed hurt. Conversation is one thing, asking about privet life altering decisions are another thing. Instead ask how the day went at work, ask how classes are going, what book you have read recently that you liked. Ask them what blessings God has placed in their lives recently. Inquire about a dream they have. Don't hold anyone EVER to the media saturated social norms of the time. People were not created to be the same, to be normal especially true believers.

"We were made for so much more then ordinary lives....we were made to Thrive." ~Casting Crowns~

Have a Happy day no matter where you are in this crazy thing called life!!

A 27 year old individual.

Sunday, June 8, 2014

The problem of Religion...and my beef with atheists but not the ones you think.

I've meet some pretty amazing, wonderful, kind people in this world. Some of these people were way more pleasant to be around then some of the "Christians" in my life.

Beware world, the Christian Atheists are taking over...and the atheists of the world are helping...

Nowhere does it say that believing in God makes you a better person, the act of excepting God is only the first step... it does not instantly change who you are, and what you are like, your habits, thoughts, or lifestyle. Hopefully it will lead to that eventually. Yet even I, a life long "Christian" still have a long way to go.

No, God gave us free will and even though the choices we make often hurt him he will not instantly make us the right kind of true "Christian."

there is a lovely little thing lose in the world called sin...and all the domain attached to it.

In the world but not of it.

On the other side of the matter nowhere does it say that not believing in God makes you a bad person. You don't need to except God to know to be nice to others, to know not to murder or steal. However, the reason for not needing God to know these things really comes down to the natural moral law written on everyone's heart and displayed all though nature by God since the begging of time.

Soooo maybe you really do need God to know these things after all (Boy can I hear my atheist or unbelieving friends now...) This however is not a topic I am knowledgeable enough to expand I digress.

This is the problem with Religion, and Religious people it was a problem even back in Biblical Times. The pharisees and Sadducees (the religious leaders of the times) the people that supposedly knew all the scripture and laws where just that


This is the problem with Religion, and often times religious people. It's a self righteousness, look at me and how good I am. Look at him and how bad he is. He doesn't read the bible he doesn't even
believe in the bible. This is the problem with is made up of people broken broken people.

Religion, Faith, and God....are all very very different things...and here is my beef  with Atheists and non believers....this seemingly inability to distinguish or acknowledge these differences.

Someone I know said "Religion is a drug" that it is fake giving of fake emotions, feels, and hopes."

 and my first instinct was to be like "HOW DEAR YOU"

But really though, this person is not far from the truth. If we as "Christians" and I use that term loosely right now have done nothing but prove again and again that we think we are better, that we are special because we have received the GRACE of God...then yes, we tend to show fake emotions, we tend to want to keep our "Religion" for the rush of blood you get when you think "Ha, look how much better I am then them"


If we as "Christians" continue to live in sin, and a lifestyle making choices that go against faith while saying: "I'm a Christian and look how good I am well what do we expect the world to think? Myself as a Christian have experienced this many times heck I'm even guilty of this very thing. Does this make them or me bad no means, just means that people are all at a different point in their faith walk then you or others. You see, everyone needs help and faith without works is dead.

The problem I have with "Christian Atheists" are when they stop trying...when they think saying they believe in God is enough..when their heart is not in it when your faith dies.

This is the problem with Religion...people

Because true faith, true love for not about the individual, and what the individual does, say's has done and will do. It's about he gift of grace given to that individual, it's what GOD has done for the's not about you or me or them....It's always about GOD and that is where Religion can fall apart...that is where Atheists can't understand true faith. It's where "Christian Atheists" fail

Atheist argue against God with their heads, and we argue for God with our hearts, were not even speaking the same language...we're not even in the same universe...but at least an Atheist is an Atheist through and through...

This is my beef with Christians that are really atheists.

I'm never going to understand this apparent need to PROVE God doesn't exist. I mean if you don't believe he does that should be enough unless you somewhere in your heart (probably that part written on by God) you doubt your belief.

Therein lies the difference between a person sure of what they believe in or don't believe in (however you want it)  it's not going to matter what others believe no matter what new facts, old history, myths, legends, or flaws you can find in the individuals belief system. I've no desire to PROVE to anyone that God exists.

I'll leave that to the Holy Spirit.

I also have no desire to brag about how good a person I am, or take swings at others beliefs to make me feel better about mine. I will share and I will witness and I wont force my beliefs on anyone. But there is a fire in me and I have every right to be respected and to voice my beliefs. Unlike much the world I'll do it out of love and not pride.

I'll leave that to the Holy Spirit as well.

 Yes, religion can be fake,.. people can be hypocrites... but God is very real and very active.